woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize