either way he was missing a nipple.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
