hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
