I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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