Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
