but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I'm too high and old for this...
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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