White coat. Heels.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
