I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
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