True but thats because hes a fetus.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Randomize
