Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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