dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
