Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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