She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Randomize
