I'm drive I can fine osifer
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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