Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
