i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
