I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
You're breaking my sexual little heart
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