doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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