Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
