have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize
