i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I will be naked everywhere
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize
