to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
