Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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