We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
