Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
