1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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