he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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