I hate all girls vehemently.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
