bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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