People in love make me want to vomit
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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