I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
