you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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