Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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