They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
