He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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