i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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