Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize