the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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