so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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