I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Mom said you looked used
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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