ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
You brought string cheese to the strip club
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
