found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
