scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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