look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
