doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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