you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
