i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
only you would photoshop your dick
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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