Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
