just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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