i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
