i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
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