I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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