summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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